it's been what?!... uhmmm.. 5 days and still in the somewhat what you call state of denial.. i'd like to stress the word STILL cos i'd like to think it will eventually go out of my unstable mind and my weak heart.. been having the sudden mood swings which i definitely hate sooo much..i used to be what they call a happy-go-lucky girl who practically displays that smile and laugh almost every moment of her life... which i think is kinda contagious.. just as what my dear friend DEN a.k.a. SALOME pointed out on her blog entry...
....as copied...
Ceangy. Location: Davao City, Philippines. Tall. Dark. Hands...errr...beautiful. If there was anyone in the 'kada who you can always count on for a good-old-fashioned night(day) out, it will be Ceangy. Trust me, she will be there 24/7 like a customer-service hotline, only much better. You can drag her just about anywhere in the archipelago (and hopefully abroad this June) without a single complaint as she is the type of person who goes anywhere...just as long as it's fun, fun, fun!!! She has the sunniest disposition in our group and we just hate it when she is depressed. So snap out of it already.
As much as they hate me being depressed, i hate myself more.. why? cos i really find it hard to find ways on how to easily get back to that sunny disposition they say that i have.. some people might not see it but some just have that keen observation who can differentiate my not-so-good mood against my usual one.. i smile, i smile a lot.. i laugh, i laugh a lot.. but what other people don't see is the hurting me behind those smiles.. i'm hurting, and i'm hurting deep.. and when i'm hurt i go loca.. i say things which i don't really mean.. exactly doing the opposite.. lol.. my truest friends can attest to that..
i just hope people will understand that i'm still on the stage of denial.. til when? NOT SURE but EVENTUALLY! everything is starting to sink in now which makes it harder.. i know everything will be ok soon.. i will be ok.. and by then, i can broadcast to the world "It's just a game of life.. you lose some, you win some.. the GAME is finally OVER! Time to start a new season...SO LET THE NEW GAME BEGIN!"
....as copied...
Ceangy. Location: Davao City, Philippines. Tall. Dark. Hands...errr...beautiful. If there was anyone in the 'kada who you can always count on for a good-old-fashioned night(day) out, it will be Ceangy. Trust me, she will be there 24/7 like a customer-service hotline, only much better. You can drag her just about anywhere in the archipelago (and hopefully abroad this June) without a single complaint as she is the type of person who goes anywhere...just as long as it's fun, fun, fun!!! She has the sunniest disposition in our group and we just hate it when she is depressed. So snap out of it already.
As much as they hate me being depressed, i hate myself more.. why? cos i really find it hard to find ways on how to easily get back to that sunny disposition they say that i have.. some people might not see it but some just have that keen observation who can differentiate my not-so-good mood against my usual one.. i smile, i smile a lot.. i laugh, i laugh a lot.. but what other people don't see is the hurting me behind those smiles.. i'm hurting, and i'm hurting deep.. and when i'm hurt i go loca.. i say things which i don't really mean.. exactly doing the opposite.. lol.. my truest friends can attest to that..
i just hope people will understand that i'm still on the stage of denial.. til when? NOT SURE but EVENTUALLY! everything is starting to sink in now which makes it harder.. i know everything will be ok soon.. i will be ok.. and by then, i can broadcast to the world "It's just a game of life.. you lose some, you win some.. the GAME is finally OVER! Time to start a new season...SO LET THE NEW GAME BEGIN!"
3 comments:
so come on guys, line up na! *wink*
always remember te that you're pretty, we are (hehe), and will always be. lolz... so stop moping around and put a smile on your face na.
unta naa ko dinha. manlingaw jud ta ug taman. wonder ko kung asa kaya ta malupad. for sure, unwind jud ta. =)
hahaha! klaro man te.. miss the billiard moments nato te.. assss in!
You are a brave person to state how you feel to the world,yes,that takes a lot of courage. I know the feelings that you are going through,went through it myself many years ago, and it ripped my heart out. You'll make it back,but it won't be easy,but sounds like you are a survivor to me.
Post a Comment